Learning How to Say NO
There is a proverb that says, “show me who you befriend, I will tell you who you are.” So whoever we want to be, literally, not be like, but be, we must become close to. Whoever we don’t want to be, we must keep at a distance, but they may still remain an acquaintance.
Entering college begins a new chapter in your life. For the first time you are on you own and away from your parents. This is going to require you to change from being a dependent child to young adult. It is your responsibility to become mature enough to make your own decisions and deal with the challenges you will be faced with in college.
A huge problem with most college students is that they don’t really know how to say no to friends. Students feel as if they need to be accepted into the group. What they don’t realize is that friends can determine their success in college. There is a time and a place for fun, and then there is time when you need to focus on school work. When a student has a lot of homework, and friends are pressuring them to go out, all they have to say is no. College is all about learning. Learning different subjects, learning different talents, and learning about life. The word “no” is a key word that has to be used at times so that one can learn.
The night life at almost any college can be a distraction. This is why students must be careful on who they choose to associate with. The type of people you hangout with can make or break your grades. Students who have supportive friends will succeed more than students who have non-supportive friends. Supportive friends are the ones who can help you through hard times, respect your academic schedule and always have your back.
Sometimes, at school, it’s easy to make the wrong decision, but supportive friends will help prevent that. A good friend is one who will respect your decision no matter what. Take advice from the ones that have been through the difficulties of knowing when to go out for a good time and when to say no. This does not mean that you should not go out and meet new people and take time off. In fact, everyone deserves a break and it’s encouraged. The faster you learn how and when to make these decisions, the better off your time at college will be.
It is easy to get accustomed to the partying lifestyle. But is it really fun when you find yourself so behind in all your courses, there is no time left in the semester to recover? When you do say no, it makes those times when you go out even more fun. At some point you will have to say no because you have to study. You are not the only person that ever had to make that decision.
When asked to do something that is not a main priority, it is always good to think about your schedule before giving a yes or no answer. College can be overwhelming at times and assignments can often be very time consuming. School work comes first and having fun should be your reward for getting your work done. This way of thinking will keep you out of harm’s way, and from falling into the failure zone. It may seem hard at times, but once you are able to break past that little wall of responsibility, you will find life much easier. The constant worry of exam grades or homework will be one less thing to stress about. Not only will you gain approval from your parents, but you will also find that you will have a sense of accomplishment and success. You will not find yourself in a hopeless situation that you could have prevented. At the end of the semester, there will be nothing to worry about. You will find yourself telling the ones who are rushing to make things right, that you learned how to prevent that from happening.
Don’t do stupid things to ruin your college experience. From here on out you are making the decisions for your own future. The decisions that you make today could be the ones that lead you to success for tomorrow. They could also haunt you for the years to come. Your choices will pay off in the end, all the hours you spent studying, late night research papers, and frustration with homework assignments will bring a career that you love and a lifetime of rewards. Knowledge is something that can never be taken away from you, but it can be prevented if you do not make the right decisions now.
Make sure you let your friends know you actually mean “no”, and you are not going to change your mind. Stand your ground and don’t be a push over. Don’t let people walk over you. You have to get work done first before you can go have fun because school is your job. Let it be known that your academics come first and you won’t let their peer pressure get in the way of your education and future.
Instead of just being blunt, try to reschedule the activity with your friends for a day when you both have nothing to do. You cannot be afraid to say no because let’s face it, one wrong choice about doing an assignment can ruin your grade.
If you don’t want to do something, it is easy to say no. Just think about what will happen if you do say yes. The best way to keep yourself from doing bad things is to think of the worst things that could happen, basically to almost scare you out of doing it. If your “friends” are telling you to do something you don’t want to do and they keep persisting, then they aren’t true friends.
Your grades are one of the most important things while in college, but so is meeting new people and having a fun experience. A fun experience does not have to include alcohol or drugs, because you can say no to those and still have a great time. Your friends will understand that you have homework to do and, if not, then they really aren’t true friends. If someone is pressuring you into doing things you do not want to do then they aren’t a friend of yours either. Your real friends would respect your decisions and not force you to do something you want to say no to..